To Make a Resolution or Not to Make a Resolution; That is the Question

By: Katy Martin, LPC

Happy New Year!
Now is the time that we all look forward to a fresh start, new possibilities, new resolve to make changes, and try new things.
Popular resolutions tend to be: losing weight, working out, starting a new hobby, an attitude adjustment, starting therapy, organizing your living space, becoming less busy, having more fun, doing something new, stopping a current habit, etc.
Have you thought about yours?  Do you have actual resolutions or do you just feel like you SHOULD be doing something different?
It doesn’t help with media pumping out ad after ad of the latest weight-loss plans and gym membership deals.  Our Facebook newsfeed is overloaded with enough optimism about the new year and resolutions to sink a battleship.  Oh, and blogs.  How could we pass up blogs?  All of the blogs listing everyone’s fantastic resolutions and lists to accomplish over the next year.
Yes, this is dripping with sarcasm.
I really do love the idea of a fresh, new year.  I feel as if it’s a built-in opportunity to re-evaluate and make change that’s wanted but that we often feel too overwhelmed to do anything about. 
But what happens in February?  March?  When we haven’t done as well as we would have liked at keeping our resolutions?  How about October when we’ve totally forgotten about them?
Do you feel guilt?  Shame?  Does it feed into the lies that you can’t accomplish anything?  Do you feel even more like a failure? 
It’s these awful thoughts and attitudes that make me a little hesitant about resolutions.  I think this is why we should view the idea of New Year’s resolutions with care and concern.
Set your goals; strive for change.  But are you doing it within reason?  Are they attainable goals for your phase of life right now?  Are you setting your self up for success?  Do you need to seek out professional guidance?
Use this opportunity to focus on real things that you would like to change in your life.  Specifically, that in which can be realistically changed and is something you desire, not just something you SHOULD do.  Seek out appropriate means to accomplish this goal, and use the people closest to you for accountability in the process.
When someone decides to run a marathon, they aren’t going to just get off the couch and immediately run 26.2 miles.  They need a plan, time to train, encouragement, and enjoyment in the process.  I believe that we can be successful with our resolutions, with our desire for change, if we adapt the same process to our every day lives.